Psst! Hey you . . .you looking for a quick happiness high? Well, I have a not-so-secret recipe for instant happiness! Trust me, it gives the best buzz and it’s easy to make! Space Brownies, Magic Bites, or Shrooms don’t compare to the power of this recipe!
The ingredients and tools you will need:
(1) Means of Transportation (Car, Truck, Bus. If you don’t have your own, share this recipe with a friend. It won’t be long before you can find another who has this necessary tool.)
(1) Summer Songs Playlist
(1) Stretch of Sandy Beach. (If you don’t have access to a local beach, a park may substitute.)
(1) Four-legged Fuzzball of any kind, whether named Skip, Jack, Brownie, or Blackie. (Breed or brand doesn’t matter! If you don’t have a dog, you can find one at any beach or park!)*
(1) Tennis Ball, the dirtier the better! (You can substitute a stick, a rock, found in abundance at most beaches.)
(1) Picnic Basket.
(1) Pinch of Sunshine
* Note: Age of Dog doesn’t matter. . . puppy, prime, or older aged.
This recipe makes enough to share with others. Quality of the high actually increases the more people it is shared with!
Make some free time, a few hours will due. Get time off from work (call in sick if you have to. It will be worth it!) Tell a friend, spouse, or kids that you’re all going out to find some happiness together. Gas up or charge your transportation. Check the tire pressure and oil gauge. You don’t want to over-heat the transportation or have a breakdown in equipment.
Tell Dog, “Wanna go for a ride?” If the tail fails to rise or wag, repeat as necessary until a vigorous wagging motion is observed. Quick rising tails are necessary for a successful bake.
Make Picnic Basket. Any sandwiches or snacks will do. Bring a blanket to sit on, hydration and sunscreen for the two-leggers. (Don’t forget to bring a bottle of water and a bowl for the four-legged fuzzball, Scooby-snack optional.)
Put into the Means of Transportation the ingredients. Set the transportation to start, taking care to ensure that music is enabled at a satisfactory volume level to enjoy. We recommend upbeat tunes with at least 120 BPM. Your tastes may vary. But songs may include:
Note: If you only have old/out-of-date songs, they can be still be used such as:
Next, add in Family & Friends. Be liberal, no need to be stingy.
Finally, add the Four-legged Fuzzball. If you do not have this ingredient, a substitution can be added later after mixing. See below for further instructions.
Bake In The Sun and Enjoy!
After mixing the ingredients, drive to the beach and spread mixture liberally across the sandy beach. The best temperature for baking is above 70 degrees, though cooler temperatures can work. If you lacked a Fuzzball during mixing, numerous substitutes can be found frolicking along the beach. If you brought your own, be sure to let it out of the vehicle first, taking care to ensure it has a Tennis Ball in it’s mouth for best results. Note: If you properly wound up the tail during preparation, your bake should have the proper level of fluff and rise. If after baking, the fluff or rise is low, wag the Tennis Ball in front of the nose and throw down the beach. Adequate rise will begin immediately.
Let the Friends & Family out next and carefully spread the blanket on the ground. Don’t forget to place the Picnic Basket out, taking care to let it breathe before consuming.
This recipe results in instant happiness and joy for all involved. Over-consuming is allowed. If properly mixed and baked, this recipe should provide for hours of bliss with a buzz that lasts for days and weeks. If your buzz falls off and disappears, simply mix up a new batch, bake, and consume.
Side-effects may include:
* Ear-splitting Smiles that last!
* Better Attitudes for all those who partake of the recipe!
* Sense of Well-being!
* Increased levels of dopamine and nor-epinephrine, increasing levels of happiness, inhibiting and lowering stress.
* Long-lasting enhancements to spousal, familial, and social relationships will occur.
* Better work performance for a time. However, too much work may limit side-effects.
Effects aren’t permanent. You may need to repeat or increase consumption.
Danger: May result in “Wet Dog Syndrome.” This may add a peculiar short term aroma during the drive home. However, the smell fades quickly. If you are married, spouse may be upset. If you do desire to remove the odor sooner and return the spouse to happiness, simply shampoo the Fuzzball and dry off with a towel when home. Spray the car with Febreeze. The spouse will love you even more and your happiness results will last longer!
This recipe covers MULTIPLE tenets of The Way of the Crazy Dog including: